So I haven't written in a few days and there's a reason. Trust me, I wanted to post a back log of drafts to you and share something exciting but felt like I had a red light. Have you ever felt like that? Like you just couldn't go the next step and weren't sure why? Well, I finally feel like the Lord placed a green light on this again. After all the party posts I kept feeling like I should do a post on the party in heaven - the one that goes on forever and doesn't end - the greatest party of all. There's not a lot in the Bible about that party and I think there's a reason why - it's supposed to be a surprise (isn't that the best kind of party anyways?)! The Lord is preparing for His return so we can join Him at His house for the party.
All of this is so ironic with my constant attention to Grayson's party preparations. I have been working hard every chance I get to cut, glue, shop, plan, brainstorm, etc. It seems silly really that I would go to so much trouble - I think it's more for me than him. I think it's more about me than him - I was struck with this thought and it humbled me. I am so selfish. This isn't about me at all! This is about celebrating a precious life I have been given by God.
I just ran across a blog of a lady who was planning to make a birthday cake for her son's first birthday only she was having trouble figuring out how she would get the strength to do so since she lost her baby the day after he was born just one year earlier. I just cried and thanked God for my son who is here. I sympathized with her loss as I have experienced a miscarriage but can't quite understand the loss of having a baby and losing it after giving birth. If you have had a miscarriage or lost a baby or child or loved one you know the pain that comes with loss. What a tender God we have that despite our pain He won't let us go through it alone. That's why He gave His own Son over to death because He loves us that much! God experienced His greatest loss because He didn't want to lose us. He is right there with you in your pain because He knows what it feels like and wants to come alongside you and comfort you. If you feel His presence more so in pain, it's because He is holding you and wiping away those very tears from your flooding eyes.
I really needed that reminder this week. This blog is not about me or giving you a certain impression of me. God reminded me that I am not writing this blog so you will think a certain way about me, my life, my family. It's not at all about me - it's about Him. He is the life giver, the Holy One, the Great I AM. He is the one that I want you to see. There's tons of eye candy out there and I love sharing it but that's not the point or reason for living. He is! So as I continue on with this blog, I want to make sure He is the focus even amongst the everyday things. All Praise and Honor and Glory go to Him alone.